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WALKING ON WATER

By emet ezell

i bought her a shitty ass chicken sandwich.
$18.59 and dripping with oil—
my grandmother. she blessed
the meal for ten minutes before
taking a bite. poured out devotion like
gasoline. like pepsi cola. we knew then
that she was dying, but i lived
in the first paragraph, unprepared.
i should’ve taken my
inheritance that afternoon:
a flour tin and the old photographs. foolish,
how i believed i could come back.
how i thought there would be someplace
to come back to. eviction and its soggy boxes.
no time to decide what
to sell, what to take.
trash bags brimming
with coats, dishes split in the dumpster’s heat.
my grandmother’s social security check: $1,032.16.
my aunt gambles it
for a miracle. your daddy
was born a piece of shit, she whacks
through the phone. a wake
of vultures, scavenging the same carcass:
my grandmother, my aunt, and me.
my mother is nowhere to be found.
in berlin, i watch the wide winged
swan on the canal. whirring mother
of a bird. the swan’s webbed feet
on the water,
quickening, quickening.
the swan hurls itself
into lift, skipping and
churning.
and the miracle?
it does and does not
arrive.

 

 

Listen as emet ezell reads “WALKING ON WATER.”
Added: Thursday, May 11, 2023  /  Used with permission.
emet ezell
Photo by Ben Monks.

emet ezell (b. 1995) is a visual artist and writer living in Berlin, Germany. Trained in the studio of Polish typographer Robert Sawa and fiber artist Sylwia Wozniak-Seczawa, they remain materially invested in handmade paper and print. ezell’s work has been supported by the Foundation for Contemporary Arts, the Berlin Senatsverwaltung, Djerassi Resident Artists Program, Vermont Studio Center, and the European Commission for Culture and Creativity, among many others. Winner of the Gloria E. Anzaldúa Poetry Prize, ezell's writing has appeared in The American Poetry Review, Los Angeles Review of Books, Poetry Daily, and Hand Papermaking Magazine. More information can be found at their website.

Image Description: emet ezell looks directly at the camera. They have dark brown curly hair and are wearing a red turtleneck. 

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